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Valentine’s Day: Single Boy vs. Girl In a Relationship

Written by: Victoria Gugliotti and Vincent Zheng

Photo Credit: Jess Vardon

Single Boy:

In my opinion, love is cool. Being in love, it’s refreshing. It’s everything you can ask for. Well, not always though. Love can also be uncool. It can hurt just as much as it can heal. And to all my people who have been “friend-zoned”, or rejected, or been a victim of unrequited love, you know what’s up. Valentine’s Day just fills you with bitterness and jealousy. Well, at least if you’re single.

For the past sixteen Valentine’s Days I have been single, and I don’t see that changing for a long time. Being single does come with its advantages, but it also comes with just as many disadvantages. However you choose to see it, you’re either going to not care or care a bit too much when it comes to Valentine’s Day. Junior Nick DeLucia, who happens to be more fortunate, explains how Valentine’s Day doesn’t faze him.

“On social media, it kinda shows everyone that if you’re single on Valentine’s Day, it’s like a bad thing,” said DeLucia, “But I’m single on Valentine’s Day and I really just don’t care.”

While Valentine’s Day is just another random day for some people, for others, it is a day of pain and loneliness. Valentine’s Day is probably a single person’s least favorite holiday. I don’t wanna say it sucks, but unfortunately… it kinda sucks. Scrolling through Snapchat stories, I see happy couples having fun at brunch or snuggling under a blanket watching a cheesy romantic comedy on Netflix. Just young people living in the moment. Then we have me. No no no, we have “us” — single people going through the same situation every year.

What is there to plan for Valentine’s Day when you don’t have a Valentine’s Bae? (Credit to Nick Donegan for the amazing play on words.) Nothing. I take the bus home, nothing special. I let out a huge sigh as I open the door to a vacant house. Then my phone vibrates. Is that a girl confessing her feelings for me? Nope, it’s just my mom telling that dinner’s in the fridge. Thanks Mom. At least you love me. I let out another sigh. I hang up my jacket, knowing that I won’t be putting it back on again tonight. The day drags by. All my homework is done, all the dishes are washed, the trash is taken out and I don’t anything to do. I don’t have anyone to talk to. I hit my boy up: “Yo, you tryna play a match?”

“Nah fam I’m out with my girl for Valentine’s Day.”

“Understandable.”

My boredom leads me to Snapchat, looking at people’s stories. Half of it is just pictures of boyfriends and girlfriends with cheesy Valentine’s Day filters with cutesy little captions saying things like “Love of my life!” or  “Hi, I love you!” or “Woman crush everyday!” The other half are posts from people like me, craving love and affection, saying “I’m lonely” or “I hate being single” or “HMU I’m bored.” Another sigh. I put on music. I lie in bed for hours as the sound of Drake’s R&B songs fill my room. Eight o’ clock becomes nine o’ clock. Nine o’ clock becomes ten o’ clock. Ten o’ clock becomes eleven o’ clock and before I know it, it’s midnight, which means that I have spend my Valentine’s Day doing nothing. I have spend my Valentine’s Day alone, once again.

Girl In Relationship:

In my opinion, love is great. Love fills you with the best feelings ever, whether it is joy or excitement or happy. Many people see it as torture and associate it with pain. They believe that nothing good comes from love and being single is safer. To those of us who have faith in love, we know that love is worth the risk of being hurt. This faith grows with the celebration of Valentine’s Day, at least for those of us in relationships.

For the past sixteen years, I have been single, but it all changed recently for I am about to spend my first Valentine’s Day in a relationship. Being in a relationship may have its ups and downs, but overall, the positives outweigh the negatives. Not only do I believe this, but Junior, Hailey Bernier feels the same about love and the holiday altogether.

“It makes me happy to see all the cute stuff in the stores and all the love being spread” said Bernier.

For many people, Valentine’s Day is used as an excuse to dwell on their loneliness and complain about being single. But for me and my fellow people in relationships, the holiday is pretty great. A day dedicated to celebrate your love for one another? What can be better than that? Exactly, nothing. Being in a relationship is pretty cool. You have someone that likes you and is willing to give up their free time for you. Trust me, it’s nice. Actually, it’s more than nice. It’s fantastic.

Not only is Valentine’s Day a reason to express your love, but you have an excuse to do so. I’m not saying it gives a right to show personal displays of affection in the hallway. That’s wrong no matter what day of the year it is. What I am saying is, it gives you an excuse to blow up social media, show people how happy you are, and why you are better than all the single people, alone, crying to themselves. I’m kidding, there’s nothing wrong with being single, but I personally think being in a relationship is better.

So, what’s going down this Valentine’s Day? A lot. You have to put in a little work for the holiday to be “successful” but again, trust me, it’s worth it. For a lot of couples, you have to get a gift. Not necessarily anything extravagant, but something that shows you care. This should be done before the actual holiday, but to my fellow procrastinators, you can do it last minute. (Honestly though, I don’t recommend doing that.) It’s important to plan ahead of time what you will be doing. (It also can be decided last minute. Again, not recommended.) Do whatever makes you happy. Actually, do whatever makes both of you happy. In reality that is all that matters. That is the true meaning of Valentine’s Day. Happiness. I don’t care what you do. Vinny doesn’t care what you do. No one cares what you do. Not other people in relationships, not single people, no one. So do what makes you and your Valentine’s Bae happy. (Again, props to you Nick for this amazing phrase!)

My Valentine’s Day is going to be just another version of every other couple’s night. Nothing special. At least to you. To me, it’s very special. I take the bus home and walk into my house. It’s empty which is perfect. I’ll have the whole house to myself to get ready for this special night. My phone buzzes and I see it’s a text from my boyfriend.

“Happy Valentine’s Day! Can’t wait to see you later!”

Sigh. He’s amazing. Tehehe.

I have to make sure I get ready as soon as I get home so that I do not look like a mess like every other day. I have his present and I am all ready (looking decent for once) when he comes to pick me up. My phone buzzes again and excitement fills my body as I see a simple four letter text; “Here.” I walk out to the driveway and see him waiting in his car smiling. I can tell he is excited too. We exchange gifts in the car, and no matter what your boy got you, my boy did better. Sorry, not sorry. The first stop of the night is dinner. Since we are both broke high school kids, nothing fancy. We’re going to taco bell and we are gonna eat as many Doritos Locos Tacos and Beefy Fritos Burritos as we can. That feast is followed up with a movie, Glass. Not scary, but thrilling nonetheless. We hold hands the entire time and I rest my head on his shoulder. After the movie, he brings me home. Phew, made it before curfew. We get out of his car and he walks me to my front door. We agree on the fun we had and he goes in for a kiss, the best part of the whole night. Later, while lying in bed, I realize something. I have spend my Valentine’s Day with the boy I love.

Conclusions

All and all, if you are in a relationship you are most likely going to enjoy Valentine’s Day, if you’re single, not so much. Or maybe you don’t care. Once again your happiness is all that really matters. But to my fellow relationship buddies, Valentine’s Day is pretty special and I think we can all agree to this. To you single people, don’t cry too hard, enjoy your Drake. Love is great, but happiness is pretty great too, I guess.

Yes, being single on Valentine’s Day might suck. However, the true lesson here is that self love is the most important love. You can’t love others unless you love yourself. To all my single people, don’t be so down. You can still have fun despite the fact that no one’s buying you chocolates or stuffed animals. That’s why next Valentine’s Day, I’m buying them for myself, and I think you should to.

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